What do you think? (Already asked but more info)?

Your essay has a nice structure to it. It is flowing, and moves from one topic to another. HOWEVER, you have a lot of run on sentences. Such as " After all, who doesn’t love the excitement of twelve hundred pounds of pure muscle running at breakneck speed down a track, racing not only each other, but the clock as well?" A sentence should not contain any more than 21 words at the most. Like I said, the story is fine, your grammar can use a little bit of tuning up. Go back and read it out loud. If you have to stop and take a breather, its too long. Or, if it seems choppy. On the other side of things, you'd be surprised at how much these horses actually do LOVE to run. They are highly competitive animals that are constantly fighting for the alpha position. It can't be said about all horses though, some just don't have the enthusiasm.